Turning 21

I’m turning 21 in a week. And this time, it’s not like every other year; this year I have a lot more thoughts and emotions in me. And those aren’t just for the fact that I’m turning legally legal but also for so many people and so many situations that have made me to reach a point where I can comfortably say I’m entering my happy years!

I’m turning 21 in a week. And it’s not even a very big deal. I haven’t even seen probably thirty percent of my life yet (assuming I’ll love long). I haven’t even probably met twenty percent of the people who will teach me the most valuable lessons. I haven’t even been in ten percent of the situations that will make me a better person with every passing day. But in my head, it is a big deal; and I say that because I have probably gotten a teaser of few of the life altering events that could happen to me. I have probably become (a tiny part of) someone I wouldn’t be not proud of.

I am turning 21 in a week and I hope it’s not too late for me to realise that I have had some of the best companions I could. I hope it’s not late for me to realise that there’s a lot of good waiting in the world- both for you to do and for you to be a recipient of. I hope it’s not too late for me to be grateful for everything the society and the people have given me.

I am turning 21 in a week. I am turning just 21 in a week. And this time, it’s not like every other year. And it’s not even a very big deal. Or you know what, may be, it is.

The Tiny Brain

​There she lay in her bed lazing around, aware of the gush of emotions within her. She could feel the pain in the corner of her heart; an empty space which desired to be filled.

Times like these, when she wanted to speak at length and still never expressed the desire to do the same, they made her realise  what they call self worth. She was learning to be okay without having anyone to listen to her all along because she knew what she was doing was probably the wrong thing. Or infact it probably was not even a very big thing, but dare she shared it with someone. Subconsciously she acknowledged the insignificance of the present moment, and that is exactly what she hated.

She wanted to for once, not give a damn about the usefulness of the present moment. She for once wanted to, fall down, and fall down so hard that next time she doesn’t feel the pain no matter how bad it is. But the tiny brain that knew little too much for it’s age just spoilt everything for her. And somewhere in the corner of her heart, she was scared of letting her little brain down by acting her own age.


I have reached to a point where I no longer admire, adore or even embrace new human relationships what so ever. I may be speaking too much, but I certainly am speaking the truth when I say, this human race is full of vices. Vices that the creator never thought would one day rule the world. Today when I look back and examine the few people I have been able to manage a relationship with, I realise everyone at the end of the day was so full of SOMETHING or the other that just left me sad. 

My friend (atleast that’s what I thought she was) in class V, she turned out to be a liar. My cousin I thought was the smartest of all, she turned out to be voluntarily mentally ill. My friend I thought I would tresure, he became someone I could barely tolerate. My another buddy I thought was going to my constant companion, his ego was more important to him. 

There has been a weird dislike and repelling force created which just makes me want to not be a human. I sometimes condemn my own existence because if I were meant to be who I am today, I am sure I didn’t deserve the whole big crap I have gone through till now.

If there’s something that helps me restore my faith in humanity, it’s just my relationship with the two most special people in my life. At least I have them to count on when I see the world falling apart due to everything bad. But trust me when I say, there is very little good left on this planet. Try to be the good human you were meant to be. And always remember, love and hate both are VERY strong forces. Don’t be the one who attracts the latter. Never be the one.

Vir Das & Gang: No, It’s NOT Okay To Score Less In 12th Board Exams, Let Me Tell You Why

Dear comedians, musicians, artists, writers and EVERY other human being who is going around the town telling the class 12 kids that it is perfectly okay to fail or score low in board exams. It’s not. I beg to differ with all of you here.

Can all of us just wait for a bit and STOP sugar-coating the circumstances of scoring low in exams? Can we stop making a fool of all those minds who work beyond their means just to score a mark or two extra? Can we stop and look at what all these ‘your-marks-do-not -define-you’ campaigns are doing to the young minds? 

We are simply encouraging the idea that works hard or not, you can still be the boss of the world.

Gone are the days when you could score 50% in boards, get into the local university, get a bachelor’s degree and work with a package good enough to fetch you a decent living. Times have changed. We now live in an era which is nothing but a rat race. And all of us know, stop for a microsecond in this race, and there you’re the last one. Bitter truth, ain’t it?

I know we do not get our marks inked. I know that the interviewer during your campus placement won’t ask you for how much you scored in 10th or 12th. I know when you go to your office your boss doesn’t ask you what grade you got.  But let’s wait for a minute and think. To reach that point where you have a boss and an interviewer, don’t you think you need some really GOOD education? Don’t you think you need to be in a really GOOD university for that?

Considering our education system, I take no shame in saying board marks are important. And they are as important as is Sheldon’s spot to him. Indian colleges give maximum weightage to board marks during graduation and post-graduation admissions. Getting into a good college takes you a long way to getting a good placement. And sometimes it is not just about the job you fetch. Sometimes it’s also about the curriculum, the syllabus, and the practical knowledge.

I am saying this from my own experience: The syllabus I am studying right now is nothing that is expected to be taught to a student of my course. On the flip side, my friends in other universities but the same course, they are studying what really needs to be taught. What is the difference? The university. And why did I not land up in a university like theirs’? Simply because I didn’t fetch marks good enough.

I probably am in the final year of my degree but to be honest, I am sure I don’t even know 20% of what the first years of the top universities do.  Those who claim these universities to be overrated, all I ask you all to do is compare the syllabus (and the also the extracurricular) of these with other universities.

If you still believe board marks aren’t important, go talk to a general category male candidate who wanted to get into his dream university and lost only by a small margin because he didn’t have any quota for himself, because he didn’t have any ‘source’ to turn to and because he couldn’t afford the donation the universities were secretly accepting.

This is not meant to demoralise anyone of you or make anyone feel less of themselves. This is to make you guys realise that hard work takes you a long way to living a luxurious life that you always dreamt of. If you don’t score well once probably that’s when you should realise that the hard work you are putting in is not enough. It is probably time you realised you need to walk a mile extra to realise your own dreams.

Of note: Board marks aren’t something that should make you slip into depression or force you to take unconstitutional steps. They are something that should show you the truth and motivate you to be better a version of you, for you.

I rest my case here.

First published on www.economydecoded.com

Just Another Incomplete Story

Just Another Incomplete Story

Have you ever loved someone who never loved you back? There’s a weird thing that this one sided love makes you do. It makes you irrational. You forget how physically, emotionally and mentally impossible things can be. You are so blinded by the idea of ‘dating’ that you just let everything else lie in the corner as if they were your 5th standard books which you’d never ever turn back to. You always had the dream of having that one man whom you shall treasure forever. You see him one day and in your mind give yourself a high five that “Yes! He’s the one I’ll walk down the aisle to.”
You have always believed in investing your anything only if it gave you returns. And returns good enough for you to relish. But this one time, you became lame and foolish enough to invest your emotions and your time in something that never ever was going to give you anything but negative interest. 

And one fine day when he bursts your bubble that nothing is ever going to work out, suddenly, he becomes the bad person. Suddenly your friends start telling you to stop being a doormat for him but you, you who are STILL blinded by the concept of being his ‘forever’ you keep doing what you were. For him, you became that one person who’s always going to by his side in times of crisis and happiness. And for you, for you he became just another love story that you thought was going to have the most beautiful ending ever, but alas!

One fine day he comes and says, you’re a very nice person and I feel bad for being who I have been. Your heart skips a beat that maybe something impossible might just happen. What you forget in the spur of that moment is that somethings aren’t meant to be. Sometimes you need to tell your brain and your heart and make peace with the fact that may be love wasn’t made for you because there are better things out there that are in store for you which you simply overlook; and why not? You are already too blinded by sparkle of bliss that these butterflies in your stomach give you, every time you see him!

Sherlock Holmes And Sheldon Cooper- Are These Two Characters Similar Only To My Mind?

Sherlock Holmes And Sheldon Cooper- Are These Two Characters Similar Only To My Mind?

Sherlock Holmes and Sheldon Cooper are two of the very loved and adored characters in the fiction world. Besides sharing the common first name initial I believe these two share a lot more. Scroll down to read everything similar in the two most handsome, charming and perfect characters of our era.


1. Both of them are super intelligent and stand out from the crowd. Sherlock is the most desired detective and Sheldon is the double PhD holder everybody idolises because let’s face it, there isn’t anyone who can outdo him at Physics’ laws and theories.

2. Both of them are portrayed as humans with few or no emotions. Sheldon and Sherlock both of them stay aloof from the people and society and hence have the number of friends whom we count on our fingers.

3. Both of them have an enemy they’d do anything to get rid of. Sheldon wishes for the end of Wil Wheaton and Sherlock is on his way to bringing and end to Jim Moriarity’s era.

4. Both of them are equally cute, thin, tall and adorable to an extent no girl can express. The weird yet cute quirks and actions of these two characters make us fall in love with both of them again and again.

5. Both of them talk in terms which are practically impossible for a common man to understand at one go. I’d be lying if I’d say I haven’t replayed the episodes JUST to hear understand what the two characters have said in their respective parts.

6. Both of them are almost expressionless throughout. They are the ones with the LEAST expressions in their roles. But when they smile (which is once in a blue moon), oh! that smile is to die for (literally, figuratively and sarcastically).

7. Both of them have love and care for their best friend without whom they can’t possibly function. Sherlock has saved John Watson times enough to say this. Sheldon has been the saviour for Lenord right from the incident when the lift stops functioning.

8. Both of them becoming non-functioning in the presence of too many people around them.

9. Both of them are no non-sense people. Neither do they deal with nor do they encourage cases and people they find juvenile. They have no room for utter rubbish and petty stuff in their schedule.

10. We love both of them equally. The cutest abnormal characters in the history of TV shows!

P.S: What if Sherlock and Sheldon were to be featured on the same show? Let me leave you there! Happy wondering 😉

A Letter I Wish My Grandmother Read

I know writing this is probably a waste because you are never going to read this. But I am doing this to vent out the sadness I have in me every time I realise I don’t have you with me. They say, time heals everything; and I am quite sure this is true more often than not, but if there’s one thing that time hasn’t been able to heal for me it is the vacuum that your absence has created in my life. The other day you came to me when I was sleeping. I am a bad person when it comes to memorising dreams but every time you’re in it, I remember every tiny detail of the dream; and not remember it for a small period of time but a considerably long time.

I remember screaming out your name in happiness and searching for you in the entire house just like the old days in my dream. I remember hugging you like a bear and asking you why were you sunbathing in this heat just like the old days when you loved to sit on the terrace on a cold winter day in my dream. I remember fighting with my cousins when they’d say they want you to stay over at their place for the weekend. I remember how every time I got 100% in a class test and you treated me with extra love in feeding me with lunch. I remember saving EVERY mango bite (toffee) that I’d get in school just because that was the only sweet you ate. I remember how you told you love the taste of chocolates and eclairs but they stick in your artificial denture. I remember how you’d call all the kids in the colony to teach them Hindi and Maths. I remember you asking bhaiya and me to teach you English and Computers. You were my first student, and the best student till date. You were my first teacher, and my best teacher till date.

You were so understanding and balanced. You were the nucleus of the family. You were the one who taught all of us the importance of each other. You were too active for your age. I can’t recall a single day when I have seen you in bed for the whole day. You were always doing some or the other chore. And if not a chore, you’d sit and meditate. I wish I was half as active in my age as you were in yours. You were so loving that every human associated with you still can vouch for the comfort, love and understanding you have spread. Even after almost ten years today, people still talk about you; the pain of losing you is still fresh as if it were just yesterday that I ran from my scooty to my house and saw you lying on the bed with all the neighbours surrounding you. I was too young to understand the loss then, but now I know the pain.

Every time I have a small success, I always wish you were there to see how your grand daughter is making you proud. Every happiness in the house is incomplete. EVERYONE in the house wishes for your presence for every special moment. And we do this not just because your presence gave us happiness but because you deserved to see all the good things. You have seen a lot of pain and still been a wonderful person. You deserved to see your grandkids soaring high, you deserved to see your son buy his first car, you deserved to see your students becoming the managers of MNCs. But how I wish life was fair. It isn’t.

The fact that you come in my dreams so often makes me believe that there is SOME connection amongst people even after death. The experience of a dream with you is always just too real. It gives me the exact same happiness that I got whenever you were around.And once I get up, the pain of not having you, that is real too.

I Miss You.

From the grand daughter who never got a chance to make you proud.